this weekend

um.. on July 15th, Winnie the Pooh comes out and so does Harry Potter..

Riverton Demolition Derby

 this guy wanted to pose for this pic, he asked me to tag him, but I think he was kidding cause I don't know him. 

MINI DONUTS IN A BUCKET!! , I didn't have a one, cause blast my life.. FOOD ALLERGIES!! they smelled DELISH.

 CRUNCH

SMOKE and

this little guy making my night, youngest mechanic on the circuit! 

Making the rounds with Meliss and her Fam... Our Adventure packed summer has only begun! WHOOP WHOOP!! 

RODEOS AND DEMOLITION DERBIES!! oh bless my heart! 

Horses

there is an island back home that I would past on my way to the beach in the summer, and on that island there were horses that lived; It would make my day to see them running all over. 

This wasn't an island, it was the arena at Strawberry Days, but it brought back a memory that I thought I lost.

She buoys me up...and let's me have strawberry and creme

We like Strawberries and Creme 

Strawberry Days

On the Rodeo Circuit.....

I'll say it again

I said it once before, and I'll say it again... there is no such thing as secrets..but on the bright side, realizing the value of  2nd chances, and not relieving the past ( again); but making the most the future..
I've learned something about regret. Regret is a wasted emotion, because regret doesn't change a thing. Wait, maybe that's a lie...regret can cut so deep you never want that kind of hurt to come again, and that is all  the good regret has to offer.

I want this look

It makes a sound, your heart does...

When you’re quiet enough, lost in the day dreaming of missed opportunities, you hear things. When all is quiet and you have a moment to think with regret the things you wished you would’ve done, should’ve done, could’ve done... when you think of all that might have been and you think with longing for the things that you thought would happen, but instead that you are still waiting for…in that moment when all is quiet and you're thinking  on  the memories and dreams…when it’s that quiet, you can hear the sound your heart makes when it breaks. 

Amie Miriello Hey

I let you touch my face

And memories are coming back to me today, as I sit and write about you. There is so much I think about when I remember you; like how I've always hated  it when my face was touched, but I remember your hands on my face, and how I didn’t pull away. I remember my hand in yours and how your fingers fit around mine. I remember your smile and the way your whole face lit up when you talked of flying and music and what it was like to have moments when the voices stopped and you could just be happy. We loved the quiet moments and missed them, the fewer they got.

 I write about you twice a year. On your birthday and every year around this time, because it's Christmas time, and you loved mistletoe and kissing….and I sit as the memories come flooding back, and have to smile at what was. It’s only at these times when I think about all that was good that I am not sad about the time we missed out on, about all the memories that we didn’t have.

You wanted to fly, and you wanted to play music. I wanted to watch all your dreams come true. I wanted to be there when they came true for you.

I don’t like my face being touched, but I never minded it when you held my face in your hands… I’m remembering so much today, as I sit and write about you… you are some of my best memories…

Jr High Excitement

 It is like when I was in middle school. Every Fall, every summer, the night before going to camp with my youth group, I couldn't sleep. I waited to the last minute to pack every time, and I stayed up all night and thought about what that weekend or what that would week would mean to me.. All the excitement boiling up in me would not let me sleep. I'd "over pack" and not even  be the slightest bit tired in the morning when it time to take off, only  when my youth leader turned on Enya, and we started out on our way cuddled up with our friends in my church's 15 passenger vans did I shut my eyes and relax and take a nap before I experienced the time that I've been waiting for.
I'm going home  for the first time in like 11 years. I'm going to visit my friends, see my birth dad and breath in the North Carolina air, and maybe play in the rain, but I'm going home, and I couldn't be more excited. It's the middle of the night, the butt crack of morning, and the sun is going to rise, and I haven't slept.. I'm packed and so ready.. and the excitement is boiling up inside. I'm anxious and over whelmed. This is the house I grew up in , I loved here, I loved it because of my friends... I loved it here..

I've got Jr High School Excitement , and I'm going home...

Over the Rhine - Born

when I watch tv late at night, I sometimes hear the saddest songs.. and sometimes I love sad songs

daydreaming

I just wanted to know what it would’ve been like to have you in my life forever…to not have to say good bye and to have you next to me, for always. I wanted to know what it would have been like if you were mine…

Sitting on the front porch

Years from now, when we're sitting on the front porch; we're going to be talking about the times that we remember most. You'll say my laugh is what you heard first, and like everyone else you'll say I was and I am sunshine. I'll tell you that you were the only one I let touch my face. We'll sit quietly not talking about all the time we wasted not saying all the things we were too afraid to say, we still won't say those things....

mozella can't stop

Sometimes I push away those I want to keep close, just to see if they’ll stay, because I want them to stay. Sometimes people just want to know that you are willing to fight for them, that far past everything else in the world, you want to be a part of them as much as they want to be a part of you. That  they believe in  you, and they are every bit worthy of you and what you have to offer, because to them, you have EVERYTHING to offer. Some people walk away, but walk away slowly because they want you to ask them  not to  go. Some people run so that you’ll chase them, and some people just keep you at arm’s length so they have you at a safe distance. A distance where  fear is the wall and pain is the road block. We are all judgers and will judge each other based on what someone else has done to us… to protect ourselves from future pain, future hurt, repeat sorrow? Sometimes the walls we put up to keep pain out, keep out joy. The guards we have to defend our hearts  from sorrow keep out the love that wants to come in. 

What does Love Cost

Being in Love is NOT free... it cost so much, more than you ever thought you had to give, and it doesn't give refunds, or exchanges, and each new purchase you make, causes you to spend a little more.

Hello...hello..over here

You see right through me, not into me knowing me. You see right through me, straight through me,right past me. You see right through me,cause I'm invisible to everyone. I'm invisible to Everyone, including you.

You don't know me either

 like them....

You don't know me either.

Right One, Wrong Time

Do you ever meet someone, I don't know, someone comes into your life and the moment they enter it, you wonder, where you were before, what was it that kept you from meeting earlier? Where were they, where were you when you should've started? Or seriously, this is the "right time”, this time was when it was all to happen, why not sooner? I feel like I missed out on so much, and it hurts so much. Like this card my parents gave me once for my birthday that said that there was a hole in their heart, a piece missing from their family they didn’t know was there until I filled it.  I feel so cheated. Time is not a good friend. What would have it been like if time could have been nicer to us, if paths came crossed at the earlier points. Did I not look up in a class at school? Did you pass me at a party and forgot to take a second look? 

“The Right one  at the Wrong time” that’s who I am….

When you think of me; I'm everything you know you wanted, I'm everything you've always needed. I'm that girl & you know it.

Matt Nathanson - Come On Get Higher